Today was an extremely important day in the development of mankind. A giant leap forward. With this discovery, our enlightenment is furthered. I, Jim Mignano, have reached the conclusion that the six months that we can only drive with an adult with a permit are the worst six months of anyone's life. Or the most frustrating, anyway.

For some reason, it's necessary to visit with your family not only for appropriate reasons, like a wedding or funeral or something like that, but also for completely random, pointless, "just-because," reasons. Don't lie, you loathe these family get-togethers. Deep down, you know that there is no reason for you to be there. Think of how many places you'd rather be. And yet, you're still there. Today, I got screwed and had to spend my Sunday with the fam. Fortunately, I was able to spend it on Conesus lake. If I am forced to spend a day with the people on my mom's side of the family, I'm glad I was at least able to to it waterfront. However, the downside of Conesus lake... it's roughly 50 minutes away. Hence, my irritated attitude towards driving.

Voices come from all directions. The attitude and the tone of them all different. What voice do I listen to? Which one do I argue with? If all three adults in this car have their license, why do they all tell me different things? Did I just pass a stop sign?

Anyone that has the "privilege" of having their permit has defiantly had these thoughts before. Permits are designed for children to have a learning period before they are allowed to drive. Obviously, this is a good, necessary idea. However, there are some flaws in the plan. A child with a permit is permitted to drive with any adult over the age of 21 as long as they have their license. What the plan doesn't account for, is the simple fact that the adult, experienced drivers that the government entrusts to teach the next generation the proper way to drive, is no more unified in their driving than the audience of a political debate.


I've got my brother in the front seat. The only sane human being of the family. Joseph actually attempts to teach. It's only unfortunate that his efforts don't matter. They're cancelled out by the insanity coming from the back seat, which holds both of my parents. On any given point of the 50 minute drive either way, the three of them could disagree on multiple accounts. As if that weren't enough, my mom says some of the most stupid things I've ever heard, only adding to the frustration.

For example, my mother drives 5 MPH over the speed limit at times, and admits to this. However, because she's more experienced than I, it's acceptable. I try telling her that when a cop sees her speeding, he will not give a fuck how long she's been driving, and she'll still get a ticket. By the time this message is relayed, the conversation has moved on to the next thing that I've done wrong/right, and my good point is lost.

Then, my mom began yelling at my dad because he doesn't try to teach me anything, instead, he tries to let me figure things out for myself. This is obviously just code for my dad not caring. Then, my brother begins yelling at both of them for distracting me. Then, my mom begins saying that it's her car, and therefore she should be driving. As you can see, this is a very stressful time.

The sad fact of the situation is that it's never ending. It can't get better, based on the very true fact that everyone drives differently. Everyone's got their style, and everyone follows the laws in different ways. For example, my brother accelerates slower than a turtle could walk. Sarah has a habit of going at least 80 MPH on North Road sometimes. My sister spins out on slippery winter roads. And Molly has a terrible time turning around in my driveway and hitting the basketball pole. The entire 6 months that kids spend with their permit will never amount to as much of a learning experience as the first 6 days that they have a license, because our own style will be found in the first few times we drive alone.

I'm already having dreams of buying my first car. It's gotten to the point that I almost buy a different car each week, only to realize that it's still WAY too early for me to get a car. It's an incredibly disappointing realization when that happens. What I'm looking forward to the most, though, even more than buying that car, is taking it out on my own for the first time. I will take a very long drive when I get my license. At least two hours or more. I'll be jamming out to either Dave or OAR and I'll stop somewhere along the way to get a coffee. When I return that night, I'll have completed my learning, and my driving style will have been found and made my own. I won't ever have to deal with as frustrating a day in a car with my parents as this one again.